i couldnt help it .
i'm serious .
every time i saw her or heard her , i just wanted to ignore her .
but i couldnt .
i just couldnt .
i tried so hard .
but i know everything just went down the drain .
i know you're
so young and desperate for attention .
as quoted from
the difference between martyrdom and suicide is press coverage .
believe me , i really tried .
and when you just did
that , i wanted to cry .
i nearly did .
but i had to save face didnt i ?
i admit it .
i cried for you ,
i cried for myself ,
i cried for everyone .
i did cry .
i'm not ashamed to say it now .
because , if it'll change anything for the better , i'll admit it .
if you know how some people already have problems with you ,
why dont you just go resolve it with them ?
from what i see ,
you just agitate the matter .
it's without a doubt why you didnt have many friends in the first place .
and it's surprising how some people actually thought that we were uncaring .
i suppose they thought so because they didnt understand deeply enough .
how i wish i could just push you to someone else .
someone else who could handle it better .
what if i said i was incompetent ?
if it'd help anything ,
i'd do it .
i dont mind .
but please .
please .
please .
just change .
i dont have the mood to blog about KL trip right now .
thanks to a certain someone .
my eyes hurt and i'm bruised .
(not emotionally . i really mean physically . )
so , just try not to disturb me .
because , i'm not myself now .
no , not now , because you just destroyed everything .
;melissa
